


to all the girls I've loved before

by cryingtoast



Category: TWICE (Band)
Genre: Angst, Based on To All The Boys I've Loved Before, F/F, Fluff, MoChaeng, but very different, jeongchaeng, jichaeng, michaeng, sachaeng
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-12-22
Updated: 2018-12-22
Packaged: 2019-09-24 17:22:12
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,968
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17104880
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cryingtoast/pseuds/cryingtoast
Summary: Chaeyoung learnt the hard way that even 5 innocent letters, could change your whole life. For the worse or the better.





	to all the girls I've loved before

**Author's Note:**

> will try to update as soon as I can

« Tzuyu ! Have you seen a small pink box, heart shaped, somewhere in the house ? » Chaeyoung shouted form her room, voice filled with worry. She punched her pillow when her friend answered with a negation. This box was precious, even more precious than her own life. 

It contained letters, 5 in total, for all the girl she had loved before. 

The first one was for a girl she met at dance camp when she was 9. A really sweet girl called Momo, who was on vacation in Korea, but was from Japan. The girl got assigned as her roommate, and they shared many Japanese snacks during the night when they were not allowed to, sneaked out, thaught each other swear words in their own languages. Momo was the one who lit her passion for dancing ; she had spent 2 amazing weeks looking in awe at the older girl’s moves, but had lost contact a few weeks after the camp ended. Bright red envelope.

The second one was addressed to her ‘rolling buddy’, Jihyo. The two girls had met the day Chaeyoung got to choose which rollerblades she wanted for her 12th birthday. Jihyo was in the store, choosing new wheels for her skateboard, and had overheard Chaeyoung worry about not being good enough and her fear of falling while using the rollers. She had offered her help : she could meet up with Chayeoung every Wednesday if she was available, to take some lessons with her. Chayeoung had agreed right away. But Jihyo moved town a year later, and Chaeyoung didn’t keep contact with her either. Gold dust envelope, and a cute skateboard sticker.

The third one had suffered a sudden attack from her dog, and had a corner bitten. It was addressed to a girl named Mina, or the girl Chaeyoung never got to talk to. She saw her for the first and last time at a violin recital she had attended after Tzuyu had asked her to go to. The Japanese musician had made Chaeyoung feel so many emotions, she was sure the girl was a goddess. She had only caught her name, and an eye contact, before never hearing about her again. Simple white envelope and a tiny drawing of a violin.

The fourth envelope was soft blue, shining stickers of gold stars everywhere. It was for another Japanese girl named Sana (Chaeyoung was starting to think she had a problem with Japan) ; her first photography model. Chaeyoung loved taking pictures, and met Sana at an art exhibit. One thing led to another, and they decided to have a little photoshoot together. The pics were still on Chaeyoung’s wall : they had found a very nice spot, a colorful and bright bar that had made Sana and her blond hair look ethereal. But Chaeyoung broke her phone a few days later, and never managed to find anything that could link to Sana again. 

The fifth and last letter was for her long time best friend and neighbor, Jeongyeon. It took her time to realize she had loved the girl, only hitting her when the feeling left her. When Jeongyeon began to date her step sister, Nayeon. when she left for college, leaving her alone with Tzuyu as her only friend in the neighbor. The moment she loved and treasured the most was when she dyed her hair pink. It immediately became her favorite color. Hence the pinkish envelope. 

But right now, the box she had put all the letters in had disappeared. If anyone found it, it would be the end for her. She heard Tzuyu come into the room, and tried to keep her cool. 

« What’s up with you ? It’s just a box. What was inside, anyway ? » 

Chaeyoung was going to answer when she heard a bell ring outside. She jumped towards her window and let out a shriek as she saw Nayeon, smiling widely on her bike, waving the box around. The short girl sprinted outside the house and ran after her step sister, yelling obscenities. 

however, her speed couldn’t match a bike’s. She even tripped, fell knees first and felt the impact in her whole body. As she let herself breath, she could only see Nayeon in the distance with a blurry vision, her eyes filled by tears. She knew Nayeon could be a bitch, but not that much. 

But nothing felt worse than seeing the 5 girls one by one, on her first day of college. 

————

I. Mina - hanging notes 

Chaeyoung didn’t find Nayeon after the older girl disappeared with her bike and the box. The girl refused to answer her calls, her texts, nothing, and the short girl didn’t know where her step sister could be at. One thing was sure : if she read the letter to Jeongyeon, she was sure she would get killed in her sleep. 

But it didn’t happen. She woke up alive, nothing missing from her body, her room still messy like the day before. She slowly left her bed, wandered around her room and banged her head against the wall when she remembered what happened the day before. 

« Ouch, ouch, ouch, dumbass. » she muttered to herself before opening the blinds of her windows. 

Today was the day she was moving to college. Her room still looked like a storm passed by it, her stuff was not ready, and she was in a panicked state because of 5 letters she knew were not going to be read by anyone beside Nayeon and maybe, Jeongyeon. What worse could happen ? 

She took a quick shower and began to take care of her baggage. She didn’t mind skipping breakfast but could clearly hear Tzuyu scolding her if she could see her. She smiled at the thought. Her best friend had left the evening before already, and chaeyoung was thrilled to meet up with her later today. College was going to be a great experience. 

Her father dropped her at the university around 9:30am : he couldn’t stay long, and Chaeyoung hugged him one last time before waving cheerfully as his car got out of her sight. A nice guy who was passing by, named Jun, offered his help. She gladly accepted, her tiny body not capable of taking all the boxes in one go. The guy gave her his number before he left ; she threw the paper in a trashcan as soon as he disappeared around the corner. No more guys needed now.

After leaving the boxes in her dorm room, Chaeyoung called Tzuyu, so that they could meet up later for lunch. It was only 10am, and Chaeyoung decided to wander around campus a bit. It was not her first time here, but she had nothing else to do, and she was already looking forward to meeting new people ; going outside was the best idea to run into some nice students. 

The first thing she noticed when she left her building was the biggest auditorium of the campus, only a few meters ahead. With chance, she thought, she could meet some theater kids or even band members. 

What she did not expect, was to hear the soft notes of an instrument she could recognize between many : a violin.

She opened the door very softly and as soon as her foot stepped inside, the music suddenly intensified. The sound turned from soft and calm to frenetic, fast, excited with much quicker movements. Mesmerized, Her gaze fixated on the figure standing on the stage, she took a sit close to the door she used to come inside. The sound was great, and the musician, definitely talented, or hard working. Or both.

She could feel the intense emotion the piece was supposed to communicate to the listeners. She felt distress, a sense of loneliness, anger also. The movement of the musician were quick, done with a lot of precision. It reached a point when she felt like she was in the middle of a violent battle, until everything calmed down. 

Only one person had ever made her feel that way in her life. And as she focused more on the silhouette staring alone in the middle of the stage, she knew she was right. It was her. 

Mina. 

She whispered her name and felt her heart miss a beat when it resonated a bit too loudly in the empty room and reached the musician’s ears. The Japanese woman turned her head towards the short girl, and smiled as she reached that one intense part again. Chaeyoung felt like the girl was staring right into her soul, their gazes fixated on each other. 

The woman was wearing a light white dress, her hair up on a ponytail. The bright red loops on her ears were the only contrasting colors with the environment.

She felt… out of this world. Like the two of them had entered a private bubble made of sounds, light, and short breaths. Mina was sweating from the effort but didn’t loose any of her effervescence. Chaeyoung was feeling like something was pulling her towards the musician ; she didn’t know what, and she didn’t care. She got up from her seat and and gulped when Mina took a few steps closer to the end of the stage. 

She always thought classical music was uninteresting until she saw Mina perform. And the second time was even better than the first one. Probably because she was alone this time. Because she felt close to Mina, even if they were total strangers. 

Her trance broke when Mina hit the final note. Only the heavy breaths of the musician could be heard in the room, and they shared a smile, when the situation finally hit Chaeyoung. She was in front of one of the most talented women she had ever met, a musical prodigy, someone way out of her league. Chaeyoung opened her mouth today something, anything, but nothing came out. She could only gape at the way the musician’s eyes were still staring at her. 

« Tell me if I’m wrong, but haven’t we met already…? » she hadn’t noticed Mina had come closer to her. 

« I, yes, we, uh - I gotta go. » and the short girl dashed out of the auditorium as fast as she could. 

She bumped into a trash can, almost got hit by a biker, and dropped her phone twice. What had just happened ? Did she really just share a strong bonding moment with one of her former crushes ? What the hell was the musician doing in a Korean university anyway ?!

She stopped near a fountain to take a breath. It was too much to take in. Mina, in the same place as her ? For a few years, probably ? No no, that couldn’t be happening. It was unrealistic and - and now she was lost in that brand new place - 

« Chaeyoung ? » 

She froze. god. She knew that voice. She slowly lifted her head ; she knew that bright blonde hair, too. That pretty smile and the wide eyes. This cute laugh and this perfume - 

« Chaeyoung ! It really is you, oh my god ! How long has it been ? Three years ? do you still have the pics we took together ? » the cutest cheerful voice she had ever heard, resonating in her ears again. 

She felt her legs turn into jelly. Sana. 

—

I. Sana - polaroids 

For a second, Chaeyoung thought she had died. Her breath was too short, the bright blonde hair of Sana were too… bright and the really nice voice of the Japanese girl was too joyful after the intense musical session she just had with Mina. 

She let herself slide on the floor, her back against the fountain, her hands holding her head. 

« You must be mistaken, I’m not… Chaeyoung ? My name is K- » her lie got cut off when Sana swiftly grabbed her chin and made her look her way. She softly pressed her thumb on the younger’s mole, right under her lip. 

« I only know one Chaeyoung with a pretty face like yours and this tiny, wonderful detail. » she smiled as Chaeyoung’s cheeks reddened. « You haven’t changed at all. »

She gave a hand to the short girl and helped her stand up, before offering the water bottle she had in her bag. Chaeyoung accepted with a shaky hand, still feeling the slightly burning feel holding the other girl’s hand left on hers. 

Sana was still smiling widely, and Chaeyoung felt shy under the older girl’s gaze. The only solution she had found to feel less panicked with the girl was when she was hiding behind her camera, taking pics, turning Sana into her own fluttered work and not the other way around. Her former photography partner asked her a few basic questions : what she was studying, if she knew what future job she wanted to do, if she was still taking pictures. 

Chaeyoung answered simply that she had decided to study law, but was still drawing and did a few photography projects on her own in her free time. They easily slipped into small talk, and Chaeyoung felt as confortable as when she used to hang out with Sana a few years ago. She learned that her friend actually tried to contact her back after the phone accident she wasn’t aware of, but never managed to get into contact again - as they both knew it. 

« However, i’ve met that girl, who told me she knew you… » 

Chaeyoung thought of Tzuyu first, and then Jeongyeon. 

« She had cute bunny teeth, and-» Chaeyoung jumped from her seat. « Woah ! »

« Was her name Nayeon ? Tell me that wasn’t it ! » Sana slowly nodded, a confused expression on her face. « Oh, God. Did she, did she give you something ? »

« No, nothing in particular, just… an headache. » Sana smirked at the worried Chaeyoung, and the short girl instantly felt better. « She gave me a whole speech about herself and the school. She seemed bitchy but I’m sure she’s just hiding her real personality… happens a lot. » Chaeyoung found that hard to believe. « Was she supposed to give me something ? »

Chaeyoung looked like a deer caught in some lights again.

« No, no ! But if she comes at you with an envelope, refuse it. It’s one of her lame pranks… she’s my step sister, so I’m very aware of what she can do. » she had been bouncing her leg a lot, and Sana was looking at her with an eyebrow up. « You know ? » an awkward smile. 

« I don’t, but okay. I’ll try not to take if if she offers me one… curiosity might win over me, though. » she chuckled, but Chaeyoung still managed to scold her a bit : she couldn’t accept it ! It could be dangerous ! For her mainly, but she would not tell one of her former crushes that.

Sana mentioned how she had decided to buy a camera of her own after she lost contact with Chaeyoung. She had visited multiple stores, and had settled with a polaroid one ; it seemed to be easy to use, its design matched her tastes and she thought the concept was incredible. She showed the few ones she had taken recently to the short girl. 

Chaeyoung squinted her eyes when she thought she saw a girl that looked like Momo, but it couldn’t be possible. Surely the girl had changed a lot, and she couldn’t be in the same university as her. She blamed the.. hallucination, on the fact that she wasn’t wearing her glasses. She felt panic creep on her neck again when Sana mentioned that she had her camera with her. She really didn’t want to hear - 

« Let’s take a selfie ! »

She wanted to refuse, but Sana looked overly excited, her pretty shining eyes and warm smile stopping her from turning down the request. She shook her head and gave a sly smile to her lost-and-found again friend, making her dimple appear and Sana softly poke it.

It looked a bit ridiculous, to hold the big polaroid camera in front of their faces like it was a phone. Chaeypung mocked Sana when the older girl squealed in panic when she almost dropped her precious camera. It reminded her of their first meeting, when the Japanese girl had almost knocked out of its pedestal a famous art piece. Chaeyoung wondered what would have happened if she hadn’t been here to stop the girl from stumbling too far back. 

She blinked when she heard a sudden clicking noise, and pout when she saw Sana had taken a pic of her without asking first. That was the first rule they had established : never take a pic of the other without getting their approval first. And the wicked smile on Sana’s face told her that she exactly knew what she had just done. 

« Let’s take that pic already ! » she tried to sound annoyed, but it was something she couldn’t do when it came to Sana. She tried to complain when the older girl squished their cheeks together to take a pic, but she just ended as a giggly mess. 

She hadn’t felt that light hearted in a while, and she couldn’t explain it. Sana had that power of making anyone feel conformable near her, like she had always been a friend you could count on. But Chaeyoung couldn’t just tell her the truth about the letter, and it weighted on her a bit. 

She left the girl after the picture clearly appeared on the precious paper, and Sana gave her a crushing hug before they parted ways. The younger girl had to met up with Tzuyu. 

It suddenly hit her that she had met 2 of her former crushes under 2 hours. What would happen next ? Would Nayeon give the letters away ? Would she now discover that Tzuyu had met either Momo or Jihyo, and tell her about it ? Would she learn that one of them lived across the hallway, right in front of her dorm room ? 

Her worriers got answered when she sat across the table and warmly greeted her best friend, before Jihyo, the one and only, passed in front the restaurant they had chosen, meeting her gaze and almost crashing into a tree after losing control of her skateboard. 

—

III. Jihyo - golden wheels 

« Hey there, my name is Jihyo. You seem to look quite troubled, can I help you with something ? » 

The first time Chaeyoung heard her voice, she thought it was the most beautiful thing she had ever heard - before the magnificent sound of the violin but, it was a loud and clear voice, filled with confidence and maturity, even if the girl looked young. And chaeyoung, trapped into her 12th years old body, was feeling like she was lacking all of that. 

She began to look up at Jihyo the minute they met. When the girl offered her help with mastering the new rollerblades the younger girl just got, she accepted right away. Jihyo was more into skateboarding, but it wouldn’t stop her from helping the young helpless girl girl. 

Frankly, their first lesson had been catastrophic. Chaeyoung fell multiple times, almost cried once or twice from frustration, but Jihyo always kept her patience, and never stopped believing into Chaeyoung’s capacities. Their next lessons got way better, and their relationship quickly turned into friendship. 

Chaeyoung would ask Jihyo to go to the movie with her sometimes, or the oldest liked to invite her friend to her baseball games on weekends ; simple rollerblading lessons turned into fun filled afternoons and Sunday brunch with their families. Chaeyoung felt like she had made a true friend. 

It’s only when Jihyo moved out of town and when Chaeyoung lost contact with her that she realized she had been feeling more than admiration for the older girl. It might have been love, and she felt her heart truly break for the first time in her short life. It took a few days for her mother to get her to go out and rollerblade again. She never stopped ; even went to school with them, struggled to throw them away when her feet got to big. They held too many memories. 

But truth to be told, she never got rid of them, and lied to her father about giving them to charity. They were kept in a secured box in her closet, usually next to the letters, before Nayeon decided to steal them. When she was packing her things for college, she had opened the box for the first time in years. It had felt weird to see her first blades next to the brand new ones her aunt had given her. 

She had took them with her to uni, of course. Leaving them at home would have been dumb. She was pretty sure she had seen a skatepark on the map earlier ; it was a good thing. 

And now, as she was holding Jihyo’s arm to help her get up, all these memories were flooding her mind. She didn’t know what to say, neither did Jihyo, apparently. Only a small thank you, and they shared a quiet moment. It was not uncomfortable, they were just taking in what 6 years apart had done to each other. Chaeyoung was still short, Jihyo thought, and the younger girl still only saw her old friend as more mature than she used to be. 

« Hi ! » the older girl finally hushed.

« H-hey, Jihyo, nice new skateboard ! » Chaeyoung mentally kicked herself in the butt. What a dumb thing to say ! What a nice skateboard ?! To someone you used to love and had never seen in 6 years ! She forced a smile but Jihyo’s beaming one melted her worries away. 

« Right ! I got new wheels recently, see ? Just like when we first met. They’re golden, now. » she laughed, and felt her heart tingle a bit. If that was even possible. 

Then, she realized 2 things. 

First of all, 3 out of her 5 crushes were in the same university as her. Second of all, she couldn’t be feeling like that again. No, no, no way. She must have been frozen in a weird expression, because Jihyo seemed to get worried. Her brows were furrowed, and she was holding her hand the same she used to do whenever Chaeyoung would fall, back during their lessons. 

« Chaeyoung ? and, um ? » Tzuyu’s voice interrupted them, and Chaeyong felt thankful more than anything. 

« Oh, Tzuyu ! Sorry, I was just helping this poor… student… who fell right in front of our eyes, haha ! » she let go of jihyo’s hand, feeling bad the second she saw the girl’s expression get more confused. « We were actually eating lunch, see you later ! Maybe ! Have a good day ! » she gripped Tzuyu by the shoulders and forced her to go back inside the café, hiding her face between her bestfriend’s shoulder blades. 

Tzuyu didn’t ask any questions, but Chaeyoung could feel the girl was curious ; the intense gaze focused on her head was the first indication, the other was the taller girl softly tapping her fork against the table. An habit the tall girl had gotten a few years back. After Chaeyoung ran away for the first time, but that’s a story fro another time. They parted ways after they finished eating, Tzuyu with an uneasy feeling in her chest and Chaeyoung feeling more confused than ever. 

What could go worse than experiencing 3 gay panic moments in the same day ? Meeting the others, of course. She knew she would see Jeongyeon, but her first dance teacher ? Her first crush ? The one who lit the passion for her first hobby ? 

Momo, right in front of her eyes, opening the door opposed to her own dorm room ? 

— 

VI. Momo - slow steps 

Chaeyoung stayed still, a hand squeezing her keys, the other one on the door knob, as pretty brown eyes she could recognize anywhere stared back at her. Momo had changed, that was for sure. Chaeyoung was only 9 and the Japanese girl 11 when they first met, after all. The shorter girl was gapping like a fish. 

She was screwed, that was sure. Her 4 former crushes in the same school as her, with one living only a few steps away. Problems : they were all hot, sweet and as awesome as she remembered. 

She was going to turn around to face her own door when someone gently grabbed her arm. 

« Hey, Chaeyoung, right ? » Momo was looking at her with a found smile, the door of her room wide open, only her right foot holding it open. « dancing camp, 10 years ago ? It’s crazy to see you here. I mean- » she let go of the younger girl’s arm. « it must be weirder for you. It’s no surprise that you’re attending an art university in Korea. But for me…! » 

The older girl chuckled a bit awkwardly, but Chaeyoung was delighted. it was like Momo had barely changed. She was still speaking to her with a soft tone that made her want to take care of the older girl, she still had her fidgeting habits when she was excited about something. Chaeyoung simply nodded, not knowing if Momo wanted to end their discussion here or not -

« Why don’t you come in for a minute ? I brought snacks from Japan with me ! I think there might be some of the ones you liked the most back at the camp. » the Japanese girl nodded towards the door and extended a hand in Chaeyoung’s direction. The shorter girl gently put her own inside in the other girl’s palm ; it reminded her of one of the dance moves they learned together at the camp.

A few snacks and a chat with an old friend would do no harm, right ? 

—

It did some harm. 

Chaeyoung was laying on Momo’s bed, had been there for a couple of hours now. The older girl was snuggling against her back, arms locked around her waist. She let go of the older girl’s hands on her stomach to check the time on her phone, and sighed at the multiple notifications from Tzuyu. She had promised her best friend to meet her up at the end of the day, but spent it with Momo instead. 

It had started simply enough, they had opened a few snacks and shared them while chatting about what happened during their time away from each other. Momo had told Chaeyoung about her wish to go back and study in Korea, how hard she had worked for it, and had smiled really widely when the short girl had commented how proud she was of her. 

The Korean girl had spoken about her never disappearing passion for drawing and photography, her hobbies like dancing and rollerblading, her particular discovery of classical music and had ralised halfway that she had been indirectly speaking about the 3 girls she had met earlier during the day. She had slowly stopped speaking, and Momo had given her a slightly worried look. 

They had talked some more, until Momo had suddenly got up and put some music on. She had offered a hand once again, and Chaeyoung accepted, again. She couldn’t focus on the music at all as her dance mentor slowly initiated a slow dance, putting Chaeyoung on a half aware state. 

it had seemed that time had slowed down, until Momo got closer to Chaeyoung’s face and whisper into her ear. 

« I think… I think I ate some snack with alcohol, Chae. I feel dizzy… » 

The shorter girl had panicked a bit and forced Momo to sit down, before the older girl pulled her with her on the bed. She didn’t dare say anything as her friend got comfortable and fell asleep in a matter of minutes. 

And now Chaeyoung was stuck there, with an empty and growling stomach, and a strong urge to leave this place. She wasn’t feeling bad about staying with Momo like that, she was just hungry and tired, 2 things she couldn’t take care of if she stayed in the older girl’s arms. So she carefully grabbed her arms and slide away from her grasp, left a message on the bedside table, thanking her unnie about the snacks and the good time she had during the afternoon. 

She carefully closed the door, shooting a last look at her first childhood role model. 

She decided to go out. It was late, but not late enough for restaurants or fast food to be closed. She shivered when she stepped inside, instantly regretting leaving her jacket inside her room. She walked straight, where she knew she would find a good place Jeongyeon and talked about multiple times. She greeted the few students outside and ordered a meal. 

She almost wasted all of her food when someone opened the door as she was going to, but her quick reflexes managed to save everything. She was about to cuss at the rude stranger when she heard a small laugh she had dreamed to hear for a few days now. She looked up at Jeongyeon with a full smile : the evening was going to be as good as her day.

—

V. Jeongyeon 

They sat on a bench nearby, Jeongyeon with a cigarette in hand and chaeyoung with her dinner. She offered her fries to the older girl, who ended up eating them all. She honestly didn’t mind. It meant the older girl had forgotten her cig. 

“So, how’s your first day here been ?” 

“Well...” she knew she could tell everything to Jeongyeon but I seemed a bit rude to spill everything about the 4 pretty girls she had met and hang out for the first time again in years. “It’s been good, walked around with Tzuyu, prepared my room. I like it here.” 

“That’s nice. Have you visited some of the big buildings ? They hide real treasures sometimes.” 

“They do.” Chaeyoung whispered, thinking about Mina. 

“Have you seen Nayeon by any chance ? I’ve been looking for her since this morning and she’s nowhere to be seen.” Jeongyeon looked worried, but Chaeyoung couldn’t care less about Nayeon. “I just, I got this letter from her when I woke up and that’s all.” 

Jeongyeon pulled a soft looking pink enveloppe from her pocket and Chaeyoung felt her heart jump. It was her letter ! She clenched her hands a bit harder on her take out bag, worried about the consequences. 

“I didn’t know Nayeon was capable of writing so beautifully ! And she said so many nice words, it really made my day. My month even.” Chaeyoung stared at her with a confused gaze. “It’s really the nicest thing I’ve ever read. I’m glad I agreed to date her, she really is a sweet girl. And look at that enveloppe ! You could have made that, Chae. It’s very cute.” 

The younger girl was feeling like she had been sucked into a never ending spiral. Jeongyeon ? Happy about a letter SHE wrote and that Nayeon lied about ? Jeongyeon, loving every words of the feelings Chaeyoung had spilled out on her letters ? She began to feel nauseous. That couldn’t be happening. Nayeon stole her work, her precious intimacy, had probably read every letter and decided to give the letter to Jeongyeon on her behalf. 

It was too much. The 4 meetings, Jeongyeon discovering her feelings without even knowing it was her, the fact that she knew Tzuyu was mad her. 

She stood up in a flash, dropped the remaining of her meal, and grabbed the letter from Jeongyeon before tearing it apart, ripping it right in the middle. She felt her own heart rip a bit too as she stepped on the envelope with an anger she didn’t know she had been building up. She should’ve never written these letters and hoped the 4 other girls would never get theirs. 

Jeongyeon was looking at her with an open mouth. In her mind, Chaeyoung had just destroyed the precious love of her girlfriend, the younger girl thought. She stayed quiet and avoided looking at Jeongyeon in the eyes at any cost. She got her things from the bench, head low, and muffled a good bye before hurrying down the street. Jeongyeon didn’t try to stop her, didn’t speak up, and it was probably for the better. In her hurry, she had completely forgotten that she didn’t really know the whole campus. She walked around the buildings, turning left and right, not finding a map. She clumsily got her phone from her bag and almost threw it in anger when she realized it didn’t have anymore battery. 

She stopped in front of a building to try and find people to help her but the door was locked. She rested her back against the wall, bag dropping on the floor, and let herself slide down. She let her head on her knees, when she felt a drop of water hit her exposed neck ; it was starting to rain. 

She sighed and wrapped her arms around her legs, tears reaching her eyes and blurring her vision. She sniffled and the tear drops began to hit the floor the same way the rain was doing around her. 

Today really was a bad day. A weird bad, bad day. 

She didn’t know how long she stayed there until someone gently shook her shoulder, whispering her name. 

“Excuse me, miss ? What are you doing here, oh my god, you’re going to catch a cold...!” 

— 

Concert of a violin and the rain 

Mina looked down at the girl sitting on her bed with a faint smile. She was worried the red haired girl would be sick after staying under the rain like that, but she physically seemed fine. However, it looked like something else was hurting her and the violin player hadn’t gotten any words out of the younger girl’s mouth yet. 

She had offered her a hot chocolate and only got a please and thank you in return, nothing more. She wanted to do something to help the girl look less vulnerable and more enthusiastic like when they had met at the auditorium earlier that day, but she had no idea how. She let herself fall on her desk chair, a warm cup also in her hands. 

She eyed the window ; the rain drops were hitting it loudly, but she didn’t mind it. Staying inside while it rained with a nice hot cup and some company was really nice. She juts hoped the girl would tell her bit more about herself instead of closing herself like that. Mina could understand : she looked sad and they didn’t know each other. She probably didn’t feel like talking. 

Mina took a decision. She quickly emptied her cup and left it on her desk before reaching for her violin. She stood still in the middle of the room and smiled as she finally got the girl’s attention. She carefully set up the violin on her shoulder and took a small breath. 

« Would some music help you feel better ? » as soon as the short girl nodded, she started playing one of her favorite pieces ; and as the stranger on her bed looked at her with big, now bright again eyes, she felt a pang of melancholia hit her and let herself fall into memories. 

She went back, way back to her childhood, playing in the backyard of her grandparents, running across the landscape freely. The first accident she got into, how learning about classical music saved her life. It had been difficult, her legs broken like that, to do anything remotely interesting for a child. Was it her fault, was it the driver’s ? We will never know but the scars were still there. 

The first time she heard someone play the violin was when her nurse turned on the little tv in her room. A live concert had just started and she had felt entranced the second she first notes had reached her ears. The musician had seemed passionate, truly invested into his music, one with the violin. She had felt a urge to get up and get closer to the screen, but her legs still refused to work well. she talked about it to her parents, and luckily, the nurse helped her convince them to let her take lessons to learn how to play, at least until her legs were fully recovered. 

Turned out she was a true prodigy at it. The first lesson were difficult but as soon as she understood how to play, it was impossible to stop her. She didn’t stop the lessons when her legs finished healing, and easily got the attention of some of the best musicians in Japan. The violin’s case barely ever left her back during her primary school years, even in middle school. It was a bit hard to make real friends with how much time she had to spend working on her music, and her parents were afraid she would get lazy for it if she began to stay too much with the children of her class. But she had great ones from her music school, so it didn’t really affect her. 

She loved to visit her grandparents. It usually was her only break form school and music, so she plays enjoyed it a lot. Fishing with her grandpa, cooking - more like eating - with her grandmother on some occasions, spending hours at the animal sheeter when she had the chance. She liked one dog a lot in particular. No one wanted it, so she had name it Ray and would visit him the longest. She discovered once that he liked listening to the sounds of her violin, and she decided to study her pieces next to hi when she could. It made it way funnier. 

she joined her first orchestra when she was supposed to enter high school, which she finally never attended. The orchestra was a quite famous one, and so she started traveling. She went to a lot of different countries, tom prizes, mad money for her and her family. Getting better and prettier each passing day, only getting a few days to rest. 

her favorite concert would forever remain the one she did in Korea for the first time. The public had been the nicest, and she would forever remember the strong look of that one girl - her closed eyes suddenly opened and she slowed down the movement of her arm to focus on the girl on the bed. She was sure of it, now. She had doubts, but it was finally as clear as water. The girl on her bed was the one she had made eye contact with that one wonderful day. 

—

Chaeyoung was sure she had ben dreaming when Mina’s face had came into her sight while she was crying under the rain. Thankfully, she had kept her mouth shut and was sure nothing had shown how shocked she was. The violinist was holding an umbrella, protecting her from the rain, and she couldn’t refuse when the girl proposed to welcome her in her dorm room. 

They had silently made their way to the building, Chaeyoung looking down at her feet and Mina humming a tune she couldn’t recognize. She couldn’t’ believe she was so close to the one and only Myoui Mina - going to her dorm, most important of all ! But it wasn’t enough to lift up her mood, since she felt herself almost cry again when she thought about Jeongyeon. 

And now, she was admiring the incredible features of Mina as the violin player gave her a very private concert. The rain drops outside here adding a really nice touch to the music, and she felt every worry possible leave her clouded mind as she leaned back against the wall, holding her hot cup tightly and listening to the calming sounds of Mina’s violin. 

But then the musician stopped and looked straight into her eyes with the most satisfied look she had ever seen. Chaeyoung felt herself blush and brought her now empty cup to her chest before giving a smile to Mina. The Japanese girl laughed and went to the other side of the room to put the instrument back in its case. 

« So, you seem to feel better. Could you tell me your name now ? » Mina looked back expectantly at her. « It’s the third time we meet. You know mine, it’s only logical that I should know yours, don’t you think ? » 

« I’m Chaeyoung, Son Chaeyoung. » she answered in a shaky voice and couldn’t help but gulp when the musician’s soft hands grazed against hers when she took the cup from her hands. « I, I would like to say that I love the way you play a lot. I’ve never been into classical music until I saw you play. Thank you very much for helping me tonight. » she shut her mouth as soon as she finished her sentence, feeling like she wouldn’t stop talking if she didn’t. 

Mina thanked her too, explain that she was glad she had finally found the girl she had sen in Korea that day, the curious one with long black hair that had stared quite dumbly at her. Chaeyoung hid her face in embarrassment at that comment, but it didn’t stop a smile reaching her lips when she heard the musician laugh again. 

when the rain finally stopped, she left the room to go back to her own after promising to mina that they would talk again, and that she would repay her, somehow. 

— 

At the other side of campus, Sana and also been waiting for the rain to stop under one of the porches when someone had passed by her, apologizing that she needed to reach the door. Sana had stepped to the side before she had noticed that the hooded figure had dropped something. 

On the floor, a soft blue envelope with golden stars was slowly getting wet. 

She quickly grabbed it and gasped as she read her name and old address on it. She let her fingers graze over the stickers, before she realized where she had seen them before. 

Chaeyoung.

**Author's Note:**

> twitter @cryingtoast


End file.
